I have been listening to the Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting series by Noel Janis-Norton, and really enjoying it.
The first step towards calmer easier happier parenting, according to Noel, is called “Descriptive Praise”. She explains in the first CD that if we notice and praise our kids about all the things they are doing well, we are reinforcing positive behaviors. The praise feels so good that our kids will do more positive things to earn more positive praise. She claims this can really transform situations.
It’s pretty simple. She mentions that it’s not about using words like “amazing” or “wonderful”. Instead, you simply say things like, “I notice you are playing happily by yourself.” Or, “You listened when I asked you to put your toys away.” Or, “You were very good to your brother during your game”. She explains that simply noticing the behaviors and letting the child know will help considerably, without constantly using big words or saying thank you (or they lose their power).
I’ve been doing this with Izzy and Nathan and they both really love it. I can see it in their eyes, how the praise fills them with joy and self esteem.
I wanted to share this as I think it is so positive to use with all our kids, both typical and special needs.
Good stuff! The behavior we feed is the behavior that grows!