To me, you’re perfect

From Random

My mom gave me this ornament when we were decorating the nursery for Nathan.  I was around 7 months pregnant with him.

I have looked at this little ornament hanging on the wall next to Nathan’s bed thousands of times.

But it’s only now, today, that I really understand its meaning.

Many of you have watched as I have gone up and down and around on this roller coaster ride.  One day I accept, the next I don’t, the next I’m off chasing a miracle therapy, the next I’m exhausted and done trying, the next I pick myself back up and accept again, the next I’m back where I started.   Even if you just joined us recently, you have watched this most wildest of rides.

But Nathan has taught me, the most stubborn person in the planet, what it means to accept.   I hear him snoring loudly in his sleep and I feel nothing but the deepest of love.  I watch him struggling to hold up his head and I just feel grateful that he has a living head to hold.   I hear him saying his little sounds and I feel like I am hearing the most beautiful music in the world.

Tonight as I was giving Nathan his massage and putting him to bed, I looked over at that little sign on the wall and wondered how anything could be more true in this world.

So for those of you who called or emailed, worried about yesterday’s Belle news – yes, I really AM okay.  I feel nothing but deep deep love for these children, the one born, the one not yet born.  Nathan has taught me to accept even the most imperfect of people.  And how could Belle be anything but perfect?  Down Syndrome, no DS, brown hair, blonde hair, my ugly feet or her dad’s long legs – does any of it really matter?  She is a person, who feels and who breathes and who will laugh and love – what more could anyone want?

Yes, I am okay, truly truly and fully okay.  Well, except I have an annoying cold – that’s my biggest problem right now 😉

Comments

  1. http://Eugenia says

    Marcela,
    I got your vemail, thank you. I know you are OK because you are a mother warrior. Belle is perfect! don’t worry!
    Love, Eugenia
    P.S. I’ll email you soon to tell you about Matthew.

  2. http://Karym says

    Amiga, toda mi luz y energía buena para ti, sé que estas bien, no podría ser de otra forma por toda esa mamá guerrera que eres, no hay de que preocuparse, Belle será inmensamente feliz, tiene unos padres increibles y un hermano maravilloso y la vas a cuidar y proteger sólo como tu lo sabes hacer, mil bendiciones para tí, Nathan y Owen.
    Un beso,
    Karym

  3. http://cybell says

    Marcela,que lindo cuadro y sí, no hay nada mas perfecto en el mundo que un hijo,muchas veces lo he dicho que el amor verdadero no se acondiciona se acepta tal como és,y creo que unas de las cosas mas bellas que el ser humano puede experimentar es el amor de madre,Belle es una niña muy amada por sus padres,y sin duda será una hermosa princesa mimada y muy regalona de su hermano mayor, me encanta saber que tu corazón y tu ser la esperan con los brazos abiertos,creo que Nathan y Belle no pudierón tener otra madre mejor que tú!!!!
    Un abrazo.

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